Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.
Richard Herman, Jr., "Firebreak"
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
On Choosing A CoPilot
Richard Herman, Jr., "Firebreak"
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
"Falling With Style
That's not flying, that's just falling with style.
— Woody, from the 1996 movie 'Toy Story,'
regarding Buzz Lightyear.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
"Hero" is Too Small a Word
Kudos to Chesley B. "Sully" Sullenberger and the rest of the crew of the U.S. Airways jet that landed in the Hudson River today!Landing the airplane perfectly so that all 155 passengers are alive and mostly uninjured is an accomplishment we can all hope we could aspire to if called upon.
Getting all of the passengers to safety showed that every single crew member knew his job and executed flawlessly.
Congratulations to everyone whose preparation, vigilance and hard work contributed to this "miracle!"
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Pilot to Tower
Pilot to Tower: Pilot to tower . . . I am 300 miles from land . . . 600 feet over water . . . and running out of fuel . . . please instruct!
From "The Humor Bin"
Tower to pilot: Tower to pilot . . . repeat after me: "Our Father, which art in heaven . . ."
From "The Humor Bin"
Friday, January 9, 2009
Never make fun of little airplanes!
One day, the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said: "What a cute little plane. Did you make it yourself?"
Our hero the Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like that and I'll have enough parts for another one."
_____________
Editor's Note - I fly a cute little Cessna Skyhawk. :-) But it flies better than my co-worker's Audi!
Monday, January 5, 2009
Even before the Patriot Act
I ran across the following and was astonished to find that we apparently the U.S. had some really weird airport laws before 9/11!
GARGLING IS PROHIBITED WHILE FLYING. - HACKBERRY, ARIZONA
LOUD BURPING WHILE WALKING AROUND THE AIRPORT IS PROHIBITED. - HALSTEAD, KANSAS
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO SNEEZE IN AN AIRPLANE. - LYNCH HEIGHTS, DELAWARE
NO FLYING INSTRUCTOR "CAN PLACE HIS ARM AROUND A WOMAN WITHOUT A GOOD AND LAWFUL REASON" (WHILE FLYING). - ROCK SPRINGS, WY
JUGGLING IN FRONT OF AN AIRPLANE IS ILLEGAL. - WELLSBORO, PA
ROOSTERS MAY CROW, ONLY IF IT IS DONE AT LEAST 300 FEET FROM THE AIRPORT.
- STUGIS, MICHIGAN
The following are actual laws from a variety of places in the United States
Excerpts from Private Pilot, November 1987
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW FOR A PILOT TO TICKLE A FEMALE FLYING STUDENT UNDER HER CHIN WITH A FEATHER DUSTER IN ORDER TO GET HER ATTENTION. -COLUMBIA, PA
IT IS A VIOLATION FOR A WOMAN OVER 200 POUNDS AND ATTIRED IN SHORTS TO PILOT OR RIDE IN AN AIRPLANE. - POCATALIGO, GA
LINGERIE CAN'T BE HUNG ON A CLOTHESLINE AT THE AIRPORT UNLESS THE UNDIES ARE CAREFULLY HIDDEN FROM PRYING EYES BY A "SUITABLE SCREEN". - KIDDERVILLE, NH
NO FEMALE SHALL APPEAR IN A BATHING SUIT AT ANY AIRPORT IN THIS STATE UNLESS SHE IS ESCORTED BY TWO OFFICERS OR UNLESS SHE IS ARMED WITH A CLUB. THE PROVISIONS OF THIS STATUTE SHALL NOT APPLY TO FEMALES WEIGHING LESS THAN 90 POUNDS NOR EXCEEDING 200 POUNDS, NOR SHALL IT APPLY TO FEMALE HORSES.
- KENTUCKY
IT IS A VIOLATION OF LOCAL LAW FOR ANY PILOT OR PASSENGER TO CARRY AN ICE CREAM CONE IN THEIR POCKET WHILE EITHER FLYING OR WAITING TO BOARD A PLANE.
- LOWES CROSSROADS, DELAWARE
PILOTS AND PASSENGERS ARE PROHIBITED FROM EATING ONIONS BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 7 A.M. AND 7 P.M. - BLUFF, UT
CITIZENS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ENTER AN AIRPLANE WITHIN FOUR HOURS OF EATING GARLIC. - WAKEFIELD, R.I.
NO FEMALE WEARING A NIGHTGOWN CAN BE TAKEN FOR A FLIGHT ON A PRIVATE PLANE.
- HEADLAND, AL
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO EAT ICE CREAM IN THE LOCAL AIRPORT WITH A FORK.
- BICKNELL, IN
NO MARRIED MAN CAN GO FLYING ON SUNDAY. - BURDOVILLE, VT
NO MARRIED MAN CAN GO FLYING WITHOUT HIS SPOUSE ALONG AT ANY TIME, UNLESS HE HAS BEEN MARRIED FOR MORE THAN 12 MONTHS. - WEST UNION, OH
NO ONE CAN PLAY CARDS ON THE AIRPORT GROUNDS WITH A WOMAN, A CHILD, OR AN INDIAN. - WHITE HORSE, NM
NO ONE - MAN, WOMAN, OR CHILD - CAN BE SEEN FLYING WHILE BAREFOOT.
- FAIRPLAY, CO
DON'T LET YOUR HORSE FALL ASLEEP IN THE AIRPORT. - PEEWEE, WEST VIRGINIA
WOMEN WHO ARE SINGLE, WIDOWED, OR DIVORCED ARE BANNED FROM PARACHUTING ON SUNDAY. - CRAWFORD, NEBRASKA
NO TURTLE RACES SHALL BE HELD AT THE AIRPORT. BOURBON, MISSISSIPPI
PEOPLE CANNOT PLAY CHECKERS AT THE AIRPORT, "LEST THEY ACQUIRE A TASTE FOR GAMBLING". - CLEARBROOK, MINNESOTA
CITIZENS CANNOT CARRY A SLINGSHOT ON AN AIRPLANE WITHOUT SPECIAL PERMISSION.
- OKANOGAN, WA
NO PILOT CAN EAT UNSHELLED ROASTED PEANUTS OR WATERMELON WHILE FLYING.
- LEADWOOD, MISSOURI
NO PERSON IS ALLOWED TO READ THE SUNDAY PAPER WHILE SITTING IN A CHAIR AT THE AIRPORT WHILE CHURCH SERVICES ARE GOING ON. - UPPERVILLE, VA
NO FLYER MAY WEAR A PAIR OF PANTS WITH HIP POCKETS WHILE FLYING. - GUYMAN, OK
Excerpts from Private Pilot, November 1987
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW FOR A PILOT TO TICKLE A FEMALE FLYING STUDENT UNDER HER CHIN WITH A FEATHER DUSTER IN ORDER TO GET HER ATTENTION. -COLUMBIA, PA
IT IS A VIOLATION FOR A WOMAN OVER 200 POUNDS AND ATTIRED IN SHORTS TO PILOT OR RIDE IN AN AIRPLANE. - POCATALIGO, GA
LINGERIE CAN'T BE HUNG ON A CLOTHESLINE AT THE AIRPORT UNLESS THE UNDIES ARE CAREFULLY HIDDEN FROM PRYING EYES BY A "SUITABLE SCREEN". - KIDDERVILLE, NH
NO FEMALE SHALL APPEAR IN A BATHING SUIT AT ANY AIRPORT IN THIS STATE UNLESS SHE IS ESCORTED BY TWO OFFICERS OR UNLESS SHE IS ARMED WITH A CLUB. THE PROVISIONS OF THIS STATUTE SHALL NOT APPLY TO FEMALES WEIGHING LESS THAN 90 POUNDS NOR EXCEEDING 200 POUNDS, NOR SHALL IT APPLY TO FEMALE HORSES.
- KENTUCKY
IT IS A VIOLATION OF LOCAL LAW FOR ANY PILOT OR PASSENGER TO CARRY AN ICE CREAM CONE IN THEIR POCKET WHILE EITHER FLYING OR WAITING TO BOARD A PLANE.
- LOWES CROSSROADS, DELAWARE
PILOTS AND PASSENGERS ARE PROHIBITED FROM EATING ONIONS BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 7 A.M. AND 7 P.M. - BLUFF, UT
CITIZENS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ENTER AN AIRPLANE WITHIN FOUR HOURS OF EATING GARLIC. - WAKEFIELD, R.I.
NO FEMALE WEARING A NIGHTGOWN CAN BE TAKEN FOR A FLIGHT ON A PRIVATE PLANE.
- HEADLAND, AL
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO EAT ICE CREAM IN THE LOCAL AIRPORT WITH A FORK.
- BICKNELL, IN
NO MARRIED MAN CAN GO FLYING ON SUNDAY. - BURDOVILLE, VT
NO MARRIED MAN CAN GO FLYING WITHOUT HIS SPOUSE ALONG AT ANY TIME, UNLESS HE HAS BEEN MARRIED FOR MORE THAN 12 MONTHS. - WEST UNION, OH
NO ONE CAN PLAY CARDS ON THE AIRPORT GROUNDS WITH A WOMAN, A CHILD, OR AN INDIAN. - WHITE HORSE, NM
NO ONE - MAN, WOMAN, OR CHILD - CAN BE SEEN FLYING WHILE BAREFOOT.
- FAIRPLAY, CO
DON'T LET YOUR HORSE FALL ASLEEP IN THE AIRPORT. - PEEWEE, WEST VIRGINIA
WOMEN WHO ARE SINGLE, WIDOWED, OR DIVORCED ARE BANNED FROM PARACHUTING ON SUNDAY. - CRAWFORD, NEBRASKA
NO TURTLE RACES SHALL BE HELD AT THE AIRPORT. BOURBON, MISSISSIPPI
PEOPLE CANNOT PLAY CHECKERS AT THE AIRPORT, "LEST THEY ACQUIRE A TASTE FOR GAMBLING". - CLEARBROOK, MINNESOTA
CITIZENS CANNOT CARRY A SLINGSHOT ON AN AIRPLANE WITHOUT SPECIAL PERMISSION.
- OKANOGAN, WA
NO PILOT CAN EAT UNSHELLED ROASTED PEANUTS OR WATERMELON WHILE FLYING.
- LEADWOOD, MISSOURI
NO PERSON IS ALLOWED TO READ THE SUNDAY PAPER WHILE SITTING IN A CHAIR AT THE AIRPORT WHILE CHURCH SERVICES ARE GOING ON. - UPPERVILLE, VA
NO FLYER MAY WEAR A PAIR OF PANTS WITH HIP POCKETS WHILE FLYING. - GUYMAN, OK
GARGLING IS PROHIBITED WHILE FLYING. - HACKBERRY, ARIZONA
LOUD BURPING WHILE WALKING AROUND THE AIRPORT IS PROHIBITED. - HALSTEAD, KANSAS
IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO SNEEZE IN AN AIRPLANE. - LYNCH HEIGHTS, DELAWARE
NO FLYING INSTRUCTOR "CAN PLACE HIS ARM AROUND A WOMAN WITHOUT A GOOD AND LAWFUL REASON" (WHILE FLYING). - ROCK SPRINGS, WY
JUGGLING IN FRONT OF AN AIRPLANE IS ILLEGAL. - WELLSBORO, PA
ROOSTERS MAY CROW, ONLY IF IT IS DONE AT LEAST 300 FEET FROM THE AIRPORT.
- STUGIS, MICHIGAN
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